Tabitha
Forums Enthusiast
Good By, Sheltie Lovers
- Thread starter Psalms
- Start date
.I read this very sad thread a few days ago and have been thinking about it on and off. I agree with what Lightplum has said, sometimes the relationship just doesn't work out no matter what.
I do wonder though from reading back over some of your posts whether part of the problem could be over stimulation? Dogs need downtime just like people and being constantly on the go can lead to the sort of problems you're experiencing, particuarly with a dog that is prone to being hyper. It could be that Sammy just needs to learn how to switch off and relax, especially if he is still a puppy. (I think your post in April said he was 9 months?) He is still growing and developing physically and mentally and getting plently of rest is very important. You have said he plays frisbee, goes running with your husband, has several trips to the park playing with other dogs and chasing crows as well as your training sessions. That sounds like way too much, even for an adult dog to cope with.
Also, have you considered his diet? It might be too 'high energy' for him and sometimes processed foods can have a negative effect on behaviour.
I don't know if you still have Sammy or are visiting the forums, so this may not help at all but if you want to have one last try then a qualified behaviourist (rather than a trainer) will be able to assess the situation and give you advice about how to improve things. But if you have really reached the end of your tether then for both your sakes it's better if he returns to the breeder.
Whatever you decide to do, you cannot continue like this:
"He has made my life a bad dream. I wake up in the morning and dread facing another day with him."
I do wonder though from reading back over some of your posts whether part of the problem could be over stimulation? Dogs need downtime just like people and being constantly on the go can lead to the sort of problems you're experiencing, particuarly with a dog that is prone to being hyper. It could be that Sammy just needs to learn how to switch off and relax, especially if he is still a puppy. (I think your post in April said he was 9 months?) He is still growing and developing physically and mentally and getting plently of rest is very important. You have said he plays frisbee, goes running with your husband, has several trips to the park playing with other dogs and chasing crows as well as your training sessions. That sounds like way too much, even for an adult dog to cope with.
Also, have you considered his diet? It might be too 'high energy' for him and sometimes processed foods can have a negative effect on behaviour.
I don't know if you still have Sammy or are visiting the forums, so this may not help at all but if you want to have one last try then a qualified behaviourist (rather than a trainer) will be able to assess the situation and give you advice about how to improve things. But if you have really reached the end of your tether then for both your sakes it's better if he returns to the breeder.
Whatever you decide to do, you cannot continue like this:
"He has made my life a bad dream. I wake up in the morning and dread facing another day with him."
BarbV
Forums Celebrity
I truly hope that you have the option of bringing your pup back to your breeder and that she can rehome them. You didn't say in your post as to what your plans were.
Like any breed, Shelties are not for everyone. But once you commit to a dog, it would be wonderful to think that people would keep that commitment for ever.
I'm trying really hard not to judge you , but in general, it is so upsetting to me that people think that dogs can be traded in and out because they were no longer perfect. I don't know what perfect is. I've never seen it. But I think the internet and all the dog trainers out there lead us to believe that perfect is attainable.
In my view...not so....ever!
I hope for the best for your pup.
Like any breed, Shelties are not for everyone. But once you commit to a dog, it would be wonderful to think that people would keep that commitment for ever.
I'm trying really hard not to judge you , but in general, it is so upsetting to me that people think that dogs can be traded in and out because they were no longer perfect. I don't know what perfect is. I've never seen it. But I think the internet and all the dog trainers out there lead us to believe that perfect is attainable.
In my view...not so....ever!
I hope for the best for your pup.
You really should have done some reading before you got a Sheltie. The things you hate about your Sheltie are well-documented. It does not seem that your temperament and level of patience is very compatible.
For heaven's sake, rehome the dog. If you are miserable, then think how miserable the dog must be - always having to be corrected. In your home, essentially, every little thing the dog does is wrong. I urge you to seek out your neared Sheltie Rescue folks. They are excellent in advising you in a situation like this.
One thing I feel I must say - Just because a breed is a herding breed, does not mean all breed herds the same way. German Shepherds are guardian herders, while Shelties are more oriented towards droving, or moving the herd from place to place. Each of these skills require a differently-behaving breed. This is what each breed has been bred to do for more generations than we humans can count.
I can't bear to think that you blame the dog for the situation. It sounds to me like no-one's fault. The dog's fears and behavior triggers have their origins in things that may have happened long before you got her.
For heaven's sake, rehome the dog. If you are miserable, then think how miserable the dog must be - always having to be corrected. In your home, essentially, every little thing the dog does is wrong. I urge you to seek out your neared Sheltie Rescue folks. They are excellent in advising you in a situation like this.
One thing I feel I must say - Just because a breed is a herding breed, does not mean all breed herds the same way. German Shepherds are guardian herders, while Shelties are more oriented towards droving, or moving the herd from place to place. Each of these skills require a differently-behaving breed. This is what each breed has been bred to do for more generations than we humans can count.
I can't bear to think that you blame the dog for the situation. It sounds to me like no-one's fault. The dog's fears and behavior triggers have their origins in things that may have happened long before you got her.
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Any kind of pet you bring into your life must be a carefully-considered commitment, whether it inconveniences you personally or not. You must commit to the animal and its well-being for the life of that animal. If you can't do that, and the animal makes you miserable, you have an obligation to find that animal a carefully-screened home.
Pets are a "Chinese Obligation". The definition of this is: "An obligation incurred by helping someone, which requires the helper to continue helping."
Kelly
Administrator
Psalms,
There is some good advice in some of the responses here. If you do decide to return to read them, focus on the polite and helpful ones and not the assuming and judgmental ones.
We wish you the best and hope some of the advice here has been helpful to you. Please update us if you can.
There is some good advice in some of the responses here. If you do decide to return to read them, focus on the polite and helpful ones and not the assuming and judgmental ones.
We wish you the best and hope some of the advice here has been helpful to you. Please update us if you can.
Kelly:
Thank you for this last post. I was beginning to think I was the only one that saw several of the preceding posts as a bit over the top. I thought that the points were valid, but I am somewhat dismayed by the way some posters decided to accentuate their points.
To Psalms:
I pray that your decision is the correct one for you and your pup and that you both find peace in the end.
While we have learned to live with (and love?) the downsides of sheltie owning, the temprament and characteristics of the breed are not for everyone. Also, of all the shelties I have known, no two have been alike. I would have struggled with Epic, had he been my first dog but I was fortunate to have been able to gain experience and understanding of the breed with my older (easier) dogs.
Even doing extensive research does not guarentee you will get what you expect. I knew the breeding/ancestors of two of my dogs extreemly well before I got them but there were still elements of their characters that came as a surprise! I have had to adapt to them and their capabilities and actually none of them have turned out the way I planned. (My obedience dog was a better show dog, my show dog excelled in obedience and my intended dual purpose pup is definitly permormance only.)
Many dogs are rehomed because they are not suited to their intended purpose - that goes as much for working dogs as pet dogs. There are sheepdogs that won't herd and gun-shy retreivers. Being a pet is as important a job as any and if the dog and owner are not compatible then rehoming isn't necessarily a failure. Struggling on and trying to persevere when things are deteriorating will only worsen the situation and isn't fair to the owner or the dog.
It could be that there are elements of the routine/management that just need changing for everything to dramatically improve but if the point has been reached where there isn't any way forward then rehoming might well be the best solution - without either dog or owner being at fault.
I do hope there is a happy outcome here, whatever it may be.
Even doing extensive research does not guarentee you will get what you expect. I knew the breeding/ancestors of two of my dogs extreemly well before I got them but there were still elements of their characters that came as a surprise! I have had to adapt to them and their capabilities and actually none of them have turned out the way I planned. (My obedience dog was a better show dog, my show dog excelled in obedience and my intended dual purpose pup is definitly permormance only.)
Many dogs are rehomed because they are not suited to their intended purpose - that goes as much for working dogs as pet dogs. There are sheepdogs that won't herd and gun-shy retreivers. Being a pet is as important a job as any and if the dog and owner are not compatible then rehoming isn't necessarily a failure. Struggling on and trying to persevere when things are deteriorating will only worsen the situation and isn't fair to the owner or the dog.
It could be that there are elements of the routine/management that just need changing for everything to dramatically improve but if the point has been reached where there isn't any way forward then rehoming might well be the best solution - without either dog or owner being at fault.
I do hope there is a happy outcome here, whatever it may be.
thank you Kelly.
i have been reading and re-reading the posts here.
also a thank you to Chris, these things happen, like a marriage that goes under. Psalms has tried alot of things, and to me, this is not a sudden decision, it has been building up.
Psalms, if you do come back and read this, please keep us posted. i have sent you a PM, i hope you do recieve it,
i have been reading and re-reading the posts here.
also a thank you to Chris, these things happen, like a marriage that goes under. Psalms has tried alot of things, and to me, this is not a sudden decision, it has been building up.
Psalms, if you do come back and read this, please keep us posted. i have sent you a PM, i hope you do recieve it,
This is a very calm and reasoned assessment. Recognizing when a situation isn't working and taking steps to appropriately rectify the problems has to be preferable to struggling on and stressing owner and pet beyond repair.