Ann
Moderator
Words fail me, Dawn. You have been through so much with your dogs. I feel so badly for you and Gypsy. I'll be praying that her kidneys improve enough to give her better health and you more time. You are both in my thoughts.
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It's a little bit like the AA Serenity prayer:
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
I could not change either of their deaths, but I could change how I dealt with it going forward.
The one thing that this prayer does not speak to is how to find the strength to carry on. For that, you have to dive deep into yourself. And you have to determine that those deaths are not your death. You still have a life to carry on for yourself and others still with you. And you have to reconfirm that you are yourself; and not defined by others. Their death, does not mean a death of yourself. You still carry on and you have others still to carry on with and for. For me, it was my son.
Ok, sorry, I'm way off topic here. But I hope this helps you a little....