Good By, Sheltie Lovers

[Chris]

Oh Sophie, I am sending you the biggest hug right now... I wish more people could learn to take this view, not only with their dogs, but with each other. Thank you for brightening my day.

I agree! I respect Psalms' frustration -- we all have our limits. Beloved Beckon -- AKA Colonel Underpants -- didn't turn out as we expected. He suffers from fear aggression (read: bluff rushes other dogs), and he's so shy he hides between my legs if a stranger tries to pet him. But I learned not only to accept, but to embrace who he is. All my Shelties have their own special song I sing to them. Beckon's is "I love you just the way you are."

 

[PatC]

It's so hard to make a decision about what you can live with and what is truly beyond your tolerance. When I got my Ozzie, my second Sheltie, I brought him home and he panted at me. Loudly. Constantly. Staring. And panting. Every. waking. minute. His predecessor was quiet to the point of muteness, so I was not prepared for this. I thought something was wrong and asked his breeder; the response was "some of them do that." I could not *imagine* tolerating this constant noise. And he barked. And spun. And lept. And stared. And panted (although it isn't constant now--just frequent). Made me nuts. Still makes me nuts...but he is nothing but heart and goodness and enthusiasm--the sweetest dog ever. I wouldn't give him up for anything. It's now known just as "being Ozzie."

Not to make is sound like there is never any reason to re-home a dog, his annoying traits are well balanced by the fact that he is, in his way, extremely obedient and easy to manage, and behaves perfectly when he is outside of the house. I can take him anywhere and he is calm and friendly. Doesn't even pant. The tough stuff needs to be balanced with positives.

 

[SheepOfBlue]

I've been watching this thread and wondering what to say or even if I had anything to say.

Cadbury has taken me to the limit and back more than once. I have told people I won't ever have another labrador. I wanted to try showing with him or obedience or even agility - all of which labs do successfully, even chocolate ones! No chance with Cadbury.

In the first year with him I came home too often in tears because of another dreadful walk or training class, another occasion when he had embarrassed me or someone had shouted at me/him for doing something wrong. I'm tougher now, I don't break down, even after the rubbish walk we had today (chased a jogger, got put back on lead, wrenched my back trying to chase another dog!). But I do know how you feel to a degree.

Because this is the bit where I differ. I love that dog, that stupid, oafish, clown who occasionally makes my life a misery. He isn't the best, he isn't even very good at anything, except he is mine, all mine. I have learned to adapt my expectations. I gave up the idea of obedience and agility, now Cadbury is purely a pet dog. I worked for four years in a pet obedience class to overcome the worst of his behaviour, now he rarely jumps up at people, he doesn't mouth (often), he will respond to his recall if I make sure I catch him before he sees something distracting, he is the perfect foot-warmer and he is my shadow.

I wouldn't go out and buy another 'Cadbury', not even another lab, I would go get another Merlin in an instant. But if anyone tried to take that dog from me they would have to contend with a small ball of fury that would be me coming at them! Some people asked me why I didn't give up, why didn't I just rehome him - that's what a lot of people would do and thought I should do. But I was too stubborn, am still too stubborn, to do that. Our relationship will never be the same as the one I have with Merlin. Merlin and I work as a team, with Cadbury I always seem to be pulling in the opposite direction to the way he is going. Yet, I still see the good behind the bad, the cheerful smile that is always there, the patting paw reminding me labs need hugs too, the impressive beg that took a whole year to teach! See, stubborn!

Sometimes you have to look at what is there and not what isn't. It's complicated, messy, sometimes infuriating, you wonder how you ended up with such a 'hopeless' dog. Only they aren't hopeless, they just need to be looked at in a different light

I think a lot of it is that Cadbury became family and of course family stays. Psalms guy never got to that stage and hopefully gets a new home where he does and she regains her happiness also.

Of course my two are angels

 

[labgirl]

I didn't expect such a response to my words I was just being honest.

Sheep, Cadbury was part of the family within the first week, I knew then there was no going back

Your kind comments really touched me this week as I've had a scary time with Cadbury. In the early hours of Sunday he woke in a lot of pain, crying and panting. Cadbury rarely shows pain so I was really worried. First thing Sunday Cadbury could not lie down and struggled to move from a sit to a stand. A trip to the emergency vet turned out he had hurt his hip, vet thinks the muscles not the joint thankfully. But that was a long night and I was really frightened it was something really major. He is improving slowly on anti-inflammetaries.

So reading all your thoughts on my post has brought a slight tear to my eye. Thanks guys.

 

[bi-blacks]

So sorry to hear of Cadbury's injury but glad he is feeling better. Hugs from Meadow and Reno for a speedy recovery.

 

[scottanddeb]

This brings back memories -very sad....

I'm so sorry about the mismatch with your dog. Your story reminds me of our Jack -the dog that almost didn't make it. We got Jack at 5 months -he was a wreck -bit me on the way home from the breeder -bit me 3 more times in the first month. My wife & I both (about 2 weeks apart) didn't think we could handle him & seriously discussed giving up on him. Giving up on a dog had never been an option in this pack before. Our other three Shelties (2 of them rescues) were a handful -but no big deal.
We are so glad we stuck it out with jack -it is now 2 years later & he has turned into a wonderful dog -still VERY skittish -still will give a warning "air nip" or snarl every now & then if he's very scared or startled, but he has turned into a real lover & lap dog who obviously loves his family. Best of luck to you -hopefully he straightens out or you can find him a loving new home.

scottanddeb

 

[take4roll10]

I'm very sorry it didn't work out for you and Sam. Unfortunately, like every other dog breed, there are some dogs who exhibit extreme traits.

I have a sheltie who is also super reactive. Walks can be a nightmare, heck just being home with her can be nightmare. I can't even have a conversation with a family member in the next room because she barks like crazy, spins and lunges at your ankles. Separation anxiety? check. Food aggression? Check. No impulse control? Check. Reactive to dogs, people, sounds, motion? Check, check & check. Hyperactive? You betcha!

I tried every natural remedy & device before going to a behaviorist. She was diagnosed with general anxiety and prescribed multiple medications. I hired a private trainer as well. Nothing really helped.

There have been multiple times where I've had an email to a local sheltie rescue typed up. I just had to hit the send button, but I couldn't do it.

I can certainly understand your frustration. These "special" dogs can be exhausting, depressing and defeating. I've cried a few times when she was a puppy. She is now 4 and she has good days and bad days. There are certainly bad days where I just want to pull out my hair. Sometimes, it just doesn't work out. You clearly tried your hardest. So there is nothing wrong with whatever decision you made. Your dog probably needs to be with someone who is more experienced with his behavior. I hope he finds his match.

But try not to let this experience ruin your idea of shelties. They're not all like this. My first sheltie was nothing like my current one, so I was certainly not prepared for this reactive behavior. I knew shelties were barkers and could be stand-offish, but a well-bred sheltie should not exhibit extreme reactivity like you and I have experienced. Just like a well-bred Pitbull, Rottweiler or German Shepherd should not be aggressive.

 

[BarbV]

Psalms,

Rereading the entire thread, I don't think you ever indicated what you plan on doing???? Clearly you are unhappy and probably your pup as well (they feed off your emotions).

Are you intending on keeping the pup? If so, I'm sure the forum can chime in with ideas to help you.

If not, is it an option to return pup to breeder?

Let us know how we can help you.

 

[labgirl]

I was wondering the same Barb. Psalms seems to have vanished, which is worrying. It appears the goodbye in her thread title was literal.

 

[Tabitha]

I was wondering the same Barb. Psalms seems to have vanished, which is worrying. It appears the goodbye in her thread title was literal.

No Psalms has not vanished, I look at who's online and often see her. She just created a thread about Sam a few days ago, I think. It may have been an old thread that was brought up, I didn't look at the date. Hope everything works out Psalms!