Goodbye my Deska

I did it, I went to get his little coffin, it's so small.

Tully was super excited when we pulled up, raced to get inside and pulled to get out the back (where the visiting room is) - she thought we were visiting Deska. It's the most excited she's been since we lost Deska, it broke my heart. And of course I cried. A man came in to get his little urn and I cried. Got my little coffin (I got a wood box rather than an urn) and I cried. Then Pauline (vet nurse) arrived for a shift - Pauline had been Deska's puppy kindy trainer and over the years he had a strong bond with Pauline. So of course I cried again. Then when we left Tully was suddenly limping and couldn't walk, I had to call out the receptionist because I couldn't carry Deska's and pick her up. When I unlocked the car she raced over - so it looks like it was a put on because she didn't want us to leave.

I wish I had given him one more chance, one more surgery.

I can't look at the little coffin, I need something to put it inside.
 
I know you have doubts about the end, but he was with you and not alone on an operating table or in a kennel at the vets.
You gave him that. And now you and Tully need to heal together.
 
Caro, honestly, from your description, letting him go was the supreme act of kindness. I have second guessed myself over these issues too, but when I look at it rationally (after time has passed) I know it was the right thing to do. I have a VERY hard time with the boxes, also. With Asta I had to ask a friend to pick her up because I just couldn't face it. My heart aches for you and Tully. Try not to beat yourself up over the decisions you had to make in the moment. :hugs
 
Cindy said:
I know you have doubts about the end, but he was with you and not alone on an operating table or in a kennel at the vets.
You gave him that. And now you and Tully need to heal together.
Click to expand...

Cindy, you are so right... many times we all have doubts once the end comes. We yearn for one more month, day, minute, second with our beloved heart dogs. Yet. in the end, Deska passed with you. Not alone at the vet or on the operating table as Cindy states. You did everything you could. The heartbreak and loss will be with you always. However, the memories, care, and compassion you offered will stay in your heart. You were the best of sheltie moms and Deska was lucky enough to be blessed to have found you as his mum.
 
I am not sure what you have eventually decided on as your memorial to Deska. But, seeing your beautiful images of him make me think that possibly a felt reproduction in miniature of him with his fur might be a nice idea. I came across this website and was totally blown away at the quality. Looks like a Japanese artist. Her ability to capture shelties is uncanny... the best I have seen...

https://www.facebook.com/needle.felting.felted/?ref=page_internal

2019-01-02_14-59-49.jpg 2019-01-02_15-00-10.jpg 2019-01-02_15-00-38.jpg 2019-01-02_14-41-31.jpg 2019-01-02_14-45-15.jpg 2019-01-02_14-57-00.jpg 2019-01-02_14-57-19.jpg 2019-01-02_15-01-44.jpg 2019-01-02_14-58-02.jpg 2019-01-02_14-58-22.jpg
 
Last edited by a moderator:
WOW, Gloria. I know Brooke's breeder got one of these after her heart dog and the stud dog of her kennel passed. What an incredible likeness and work of art.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top